Some poor 21-year old student got a restraining order against her parents.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/12/27/aubrey-ireland-restraining-order-parents_n_2372043.html
She is ON THE DEANS LIST.
"The dean's list student's complaints against her parents began when she realized they'd installed monitoring software on her computer and her phone."
MONITORING SOFTWARE on her computer and phone. Without her knowledge.
She had to Skype with them to prove she was home, including leaving Skype running ALL NIGHT so her mother could watch her sleep. <-- (hello, idea for an episode of L&O SVU.)
"Her parents allegedly became so overbearing that they installed keylogging software on her computer and cell phone to keep track of her every move.
She told the court, "I was a dog with a collar on.”
According to the Cincinnati Enquirer, the school hired security guards to keep them out of their daughter's performances in school productions. When she cut off all contact with them, her parents responded by stopping payment on tuition checks.
Both the school and the court have sided with Aubrey. The University of Cincinnati gave her a full scholarship for her senior year, and the judge issued a civil stalking order against her parents, ordering them to stay at least 500 feet away from her and have no contact with her until September 2013."
The SCHOOL hired security guards. AND gave her a scholarship for her senior year. The school officials WERE DONE WITH THEM.
If this had been her boyfriend, people would have been all over it. Her parents are telling everyone she is just spoiled.
Stalking is stalking, no matter who's involved!
ReplyDeleteI'm grateful my NPs are either "punishing" me with their silence or have too much pride (unlike their son) to stalk me!
In spite of missing a semester because she was hospitalized with an eating disorder (thank you grandma), my DD graduated with high distinction on the Dean's List but the NGC has decreed that she'll never amount to anything! Fortunately, she hasn't followed in her uncle's footsteps and actually works for a living.
My mother would have had full contact negotiations with the court and school administrators at motel 6, and I would have been expelled and prosecuted for fucking up in a no fucking up zone.
ReplyDeleteI checked her out. She looks like a real trouble maker to me.
DeleteGladys, I'd like to sing you a song, just for fun.
ReplyDeleteHello my baby,
hello my honey
hello my ragtime gal
Send me a kiss by wire
baby my heart's on fire!
If you refuse me,
honey you lose me
then you'll be left alooooone
so baby telephone,
and tell me your my owwwwwwwn!
Jonsi, this is awesome. It reminds me of Michigan J. Frog, one of my favorite cartoons.
DeleteThank you! You made me laugh out loud - I am picturing you in a top hat!
Ah ha! And how about this one, from one of our favorite movies!
Deletehttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aVZUVeMtYXc
oh my jeebus, I had forgotten about that scene!
DeleteI saw this too on the news the other day. To me, it was obvious. This chick was a GOOD kid, on the dean's list, did everything she was told, but finally couldn't take it anymore. Obviously, some judge thought so. The school thought so. So much so that they gave her lots of money to go to school (and I'll bet the school won't demand surveillance software on her computer in trade for the money).
ReplyDeleteAnd then I read all the comments under the article. Although some people saw it for what it was, there were so many, TOO many people that sided with her parents. She's a selfish bitch, spoiled brat, mooching ho. That's how people described her. They said have her quit taking the money and then see how she fairs in the "cold world", they said, she'll come running back (because apparently, you should put up with anything if someone is paying your bills.) I was shocked how many people sided against her.
But that's what we are up against. A fucked up society that would NEVER expect a woman to take that from her boyfriend, or her husband. Or even that a child had rights to tell their parents what to do and to spy on them and control them if they gave them money.
I think one of the biggest blessings I've had is poor parents. Well, not poor, but not well off enough to control me with money. Not that I'd let anyone do this to me now, but I wonder, if I'd been fenced by threats of monetary with drawl all my life, how much things would've been different. At 18, I moved out. And while my parents sent me some money here or there, or paid for car repair once and a while while I was in college, I paid 95% of my bills and tuition. Being financial independent from them gave me freedom.
Jessie, my parents were furious--absolutely FURIOUS--that I went to college, and "punished" me by refusing to give me even a cent. Not even a Christmas or birthday present (though I was expected to get them all gifts). I made it through with a combination of scholarships, grants, and a bunch of stupid little jobs. When I graduated, a bank notified me that it was time to repay my loans. My *what*?!? It seems the NFOO took out student loans in my name to the tune of $25k years and had themselves a grand party while I was working my way through school. This was 20 years ago and I have no idea if loan companies require proof the student even knows about the loans now, but they certainly didn't back then because I never signed anything (but was legally responsible for repayment).
DeleteKnow what? They taught me I could survive just fine without them, and that lesson was priceless.
--LuLoo
Ooops, typo--should read "to the tune of $25k over four years" not "to the tune of $25k years". Not sure what happened to the "over four" part.
Delete--LuLoo again
LuLoo, that's disgusting. I can't believe they would steal from you...because that's what they did, and nothing could be done about it.
DeleteI'm glad you are away from them.
But Jessie, they did not steal because they were *entitled* to my money. After all, what are we ACoNs but an endless source of support for the N's? :-)
Delete--LuLoo
Holy crap, that poor girl. I'm glad she was believed and received support. I hope no one is telling her, "They're your parents, they love you, they're doing the best they can."
ReplyDeleteShe stands a fighting chance.
It does my heart so much GOOD to FINALLY see the Legal System working as it should, and some one enjoying the fruits of what some of us begged for years ago: New Stalking Laws, True Enforcement REGARDLESS of who the "Perps" are.
ReplyDeleteI didn't bother looking at the Comments-I've heard 'em for a life time and they're essentially all the same "excuse for abuse." Now hear this: There aren't ANY "acceptable" excuses for Stalking and Harassment. None. Nada.
I sincerely hope this young woman requests an Extension of the Order when it's due.
TW
Her mother said "We're not bothering her." WTF! Obviously, if your adult child has to go to court over you - YOU'RE BOTHERING HER!
ReplyDeleteIt seems like the mother thinks she can speak FOR her daughter, and come up with the opinion she thinks she should have! "We're not bothering her" -- Thats kind of like saying
"She likes liver." when she doesn't
or
"She loves the color puce." when she doesn't
or
"She hates listening to music." when she loves music
Hey mom --- have you said it? I bet you have. "She loves us SO much."
Really?
Or how about "She thinks we were wonderful parents, not controlling at all!"
This girl's life is going to be harder than it has to be, because she never had normal parents she could count on, to help her. She only had parents who gave, with strings attached. They gave, but she had to perform, and do what they wanted her to do. They gave -- but they made everyone around them aware how much they did. I am sure its been said a million times by them... "After everything we did for you!"
I HATE these people. And I too, was very shocked that so many people think this young woman is a spoiled brat, who should apparently keep putting up with this behavior from her parents. Like how long - forever? Because they paid for her college education? When she gets married -- they should ask her P's where they should live, how many children they should have, and how often its appropriate to have s3x?
This is the perfect time for her to say FO. They aren't paying for her last year. They say they want her to PAY THEM BACK, for the tuition they already spent. I say - SHE EARNED THAT MF'ING TUITION!
Hear hear! Hemigirl, that's a good point. She earned that tuition a gabillion times over, I'm certain.
DeleteI am actually amazed that this girl had the balls to do this at such a young age - being away at school probably really helped her get perspective.
Going NO CONTACT is always the last resort of us ACoNs. But the fuckers never see it that way.
Ah, yes, the old "After everything we've done for you" card!
DeleteMy NFOO's dream for me was this: I would graduated high school, then go work at Woolworth's or McDonald's or some such place--part time, of course, because I was to be my mother's driver (my NM never learned how to drive, because it was much better to make other people drive you around). I would pay rent to live in my parents' house, of course, because the scapegoat must not get too spoiled.
Instead, in high school I fell in love with the brand-new field of computer programming. I was good at it, too--good enough to get scholarships to study it at the state school. My computer science teacher helped me apply to early admission, and my senior year of high school I knew I was accepted to college, which my parents thought was utterly stupid--they didn't go to college, so I couldn't, either. Who did I think I was, trying to get above my raising? I worked fulltime my senior year while going to school and taking care of the NFOO.
Going to college was like opening the door to Oz. A friend's family drove me there because my NFOO refused (I didn't own a car; couldn't afford one). Suddenly my life was all about me, not the NFOO. I was responsible only for myself, not them.
I graduated with honors and a job offer in hand, and my NFOO was FURIOUS because they expected me to earn my degree, come home, and rent a room from them while working some menial part-time job that would allow me plenty of time to care-take them. They actually threw at me the "After all we've done for you!" line. In their minds, I betrayed them by...having a life.
--LuLoo