Nobody in my world tells the truth. The truth about people – the man behind the curtain. I guess when I talk truth it probably sounds like I am badmouthing everyone. Gossip. But it’s the post-game wrap up that I like to do after a party or gathering. I am not speaking of the gossip that most women endure/participate in – who is fucking who and what shoes and her hair and his drinking problem. NO. I am speaking of the narcissists and passive-agressives in the group. The disrespect and blatant encroachment over boundaries that happens underneath hihowareyou and whatanadorablepurse and youaresofunny.
What I really want is for someone, anyone, to see what I see. To see SEE what really is there. What was truly being said with that glance – with that shrug. To recognize, like I recognize, that the veneer of civility is JUST THAT. Am I the only one who can see that the emperor is nekkid?
It’s odd that I never felt crazy – that I always knew that I could see and smell what others ignored. There is so much NOT said. People stop short of saying the truth. I want to SHOUT the truth. The truth about the truth tho, is that it is usually very negative. Because people don’t usually hide SWEET behind the veneer of SHIT. It is always, in my experience, the other way around. The dung ball in a nice candy coating. And NOBODY will talk about it. It spreads negativity! No, it spreads the truth.
I have no one to speak the truth to. Nobody will listen, and nobody sees it. I need a partner who can see the truth, and who will speak it to me. I do not care (much) about your shoes. I care about my soul. You are sucking on it. Please to remove yourself.