I have been contacted by a relative on my mother's side - the egg doner mother. And it froze me. I was doing all this searching, I have all these questions - now the only question is, what good will it do me. And, I don't know. I haven't answered the email.
My childhood was horrible. They were horrendous parents. What difference does that make now? I don't know if I want to know about it. I wont watch hollywood movies about abusers - why would I want a NON fiction story that has me as one of the main characters?
I have no room in my quiet, sturdy, happy life for a tortuous memoire. I'm a little lost as to what to do here.
More thinking, more quiet. More walks. That will help me decide.